The strangest thing to EVER happen to me.

I was recently at the movies with my girlfriend, my brother and his girlfriend.

We were just sitting around enjoying the movie when I decided to go in for another kiss.

It's not unusual for me to kiss my girlfriend, we make out all the time, but I noticed something immediately after this run of the mill, 30 second kiss.

Earlier in the movie, this man had come into the theater by himself, and ran into the VERY back. Literally RAN into the back of the theater.

We were in the second furthest back row, and this man was behind us.

After the kiss, I noticed this man behind us doing something... well, unusual.

He was completely naked.
No Shirt.
No Pants.
No Underwear.

Just jerking it off.

to the movie "Taken"
Almost every girl in the movie was beaten and taken hostage, and then sold as a whore.

There are some sick people in this world.
So I happily went back to my girlfriend, who promptly moved with me to the other side of the theater.

When the movie was over he dashed out before we could do anything.

Comments

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Roland7749 2009-04-04 16:05:46

DUDE WTF YOU SHOULD HAVE ARRESTED THAT FREAK!

OneLastCaress 2009-04-04 16:05:46

I'm not a fucking cop, for the last time!

Chdonga 2009-04-04 16:10:44

Couldn't you report that guy to the police for public masturbation?

OneLastCaress 2009-04-04 16:10:44

Like they're gonna believe a 14 year old preppy girl and a 14 year old guy that looks like a stoner.

djmrules 2009-04-04 17:09:41

Lol that's actually kinda funny. I would have been more freaked out than anything though.

OneLastCaress 2009-04-04 17:09:41

Yeah, it was an interesting situation. I just kinda whispered in my girlfriend's ear and we moved across the theater. He stayed right behind my bro and his girlfriend though, and it was kinda amusing.

The movie was pretty good too. I recommend seeing it.

TheSilverGuitar 2009-04-04 18:53:34

*To myself*
I wonder if he suspects me yet...

OneLastCaress 2009-04-04 18:53:34

Are you particularly hairy?

aninjaman 2009-04-08 22:02:22

WHAT I DO IN A THEATER IS MY OWN BUSINESS THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

OneLastCaress 2009-04-08 22:02:22

you're my hero.

RedStripedd 2009-04-20 08:38:25

That movie is pretty meh

Carmilla 2009-04-26 08:44:56

He probably wasn't jacking off to the movie. He was jacking off to the idea of sitting behind people, doing that freaky shit, and getting away with it. Chances are he was waiting for someone to come in and sit down before he moved behind them to do it.

Hopefully he didn't get anything in your hair before you moved. LAWLZ

OneLastCaress 2009-04-26 08:44:56

My pillow does smell...

Kinspin 2009-05-17 02:16:46

cool story bro

OneLastCaress 2009-05-17 02:16:46

I should've taken the blue pill.